Story #58 - Postpartum Pandemic Stories - Rosemary, Woodbridge VA (USA)

Rosemary is a beautiful writer and has agreed to share with us her Quarantine Diary. I'll publish some of her stories throughout the next few weeks to make you smile and nod in agreement. You can also like her Facebook page here.


QDay2

Things I hear at Rosemary's

Get your hands out of your butt.

Get your fingers out of your crack.

Don't touch your face.

Don't touch my face!

No!

Stop it!

Where are your pants?

Ok eat it! (FFS!)

Where are your shoes?

You have to use the potty!

No!

Stop it!

Where's the pacifier?

No!

Stop it!

Put the socks back.

Margaret! That's cheese! Not a crayon!

No!

Stop it!

Go outside! (You need pants!)

Use the potty.


QDay3

Movies: Outbreak, Frozen 2

Went outside to check on Eamon. Strange man from behind the fence told me I should close the gate cause Eamon was walking around outside. Don’t worry, he came back before we ever knew he was gone! 😳👍🏻

Chalk day! Margaret loves it. She loves it so much she is wearing it, holding each piece, and wants to bring it inside. If a piece falls from her grasp she loses her mind. I won’t let her in so we are in a silent standoff here on the patio.

Dave is now on telework he went into the office to bring stuff home and ended up staying there all day. So, that’s working.

The amount of people who are allowed to be together is shrinking and soon may mean there are too many people in my house. Well, let’s be real, we know there are too many people in my house already.

We ate cupcakes and pop tarts. Some of us bathed. Some of us are in yesterday’s clothes and some of us only put on fresh clothes. 🤷🏼‍♀️


QD4

Movies: Frozen 2 x 5, Brave

Food: donuts, cookies, chips

The adults ate Mexican. Take out. I mean, we don’t want to eat the food that is in the house because then it won’t be here.

PE Class: synchronized swings. Lots of room for improvement.

Fewer of us have bathed or changed our clothes today.

We are solving disputes in the backyard with bubble suits. So, if they get a question wrong or they are mean, they put on the suits. This is expected to escalate quickly into trial by combat.

One of us goes to the store every day just to see what might be there that we might need even though we currently don’t need anything. TP/paper towels are now locked up at CVS behind the counter like cigarettes used to be. It’s a good sign - means society is being kind. 😒

Empty threats introduced today: “if you don’t go outside and leave me alone, I will make you stay outside all day long!”

Since my kids refused to go outside to play (and leave me alone) on several occasions I decided to disappear outside myself. It worked. I almost finished a book before they found me. But, I may have also got a sunburn. Once they come outside I go back in - it takes a while for them to figure it out.

1st-grade work is really easy. It’s so easy I struggle with my kid not immediately knowing the answer. 🙄 I mean, CATCH UP KID.

Took Ben for a walk today. We passed an older gentleman who legit wanted to stop and have a conversation about Ben’s crocs. “SIX FEET MAN. THERE IS A PANDEMIC.” I was perplexed - it’s not just my TV, right? Everyone’s TV says we should all stay away from one another, right?!


QD5

Did we even eat breakfast? Someone had Doritos for sure.

The kids painted the fence. The first time with water and the second time with soapy water. I will load it up to Pinterest next for all of you who are interested.

Ben who wants help with everything except the bathroom where the issues are a greater risk for being messy, locked himself in the bathroom because OF COURSE HE DID. As I asked him to open the door he yelled, “Mommy, a minute! I’m busy. The poop is still coming out.” Sigh. “Ben do you know how to unlock the door when you are finished?” “I don’t know! Busy!” He did not know. I bought a new door handle that has no lock about a year ago. Dave hasn’t installed it yet. I reminded him of this as he unscrewed the doorknob to release Ben.

I went to the store just to see what was there. There was one package of ground beef. Couldn’t leave it behind. But was worried something was wrong with it. Will meat disappear?! STILL HAD TO HAVE IT.

We didn’t do any school work yesterday or today. Honestly, I forgot. It was nice out. So, I chose to just yell at them to get the hell outside all day. They complained constantly telling me they were too hot. It was 67°.

I think I fed them dinner - not sure. We had sloppy joes because, ground beef. But the kids wouldn’t eat that. I picked Cheerios and Doritos off the floor so someone ate those.

Not evident in these pictures is the screaming about whose turn it was with the brush to paint the water or the water pen to make the colors show on the mat. Oh, and the screaming about who wanted fries and/or nuggets at lunchtime.

Owen only eats nuggets.

Ben only eats fries.

Eamon eats fries and nuggets (only McDs).

Margaret always eats fries and occasionally a nugget - it’s her prerogative.

Ginny escapes to Target and bought more crafts so tomorrow we will whip those out and listen to them scream/fight/yell about who has what and who steals what.

I found water balloons tucked away and I’m not sure if I’m going to let them use them or fill them and throw them at my kids from the 2nd floor every time they complain about life. Thoughts?

#isitoveryet

#igaveupaskingeamontousethepotty


QD6

WE HAD TO TURN ON THE AC TODAY. Can anything be normal? It’s March 20th for heavens sake.

We did 0 school work and liked it.

We didn’t watch any movies.

The kids were outside destroying the yard.

Margaret wants to stand in the pantry declining all food options available to her ad nauseum.

Took Ben to the ENT - persistent ear issues. And, let me tell ya. There are way too many people out and about. If most places are closed and people are working for home, I’m not sure what everyone is doing out there but it feels like you all are making this take longer.

I called our health insurance 4 times inquiring about coverage for teletherapy since in clinic work has to stop for the time being. I was repeatedly told it was covered only for our provider to be told it wasn’t covered. Despite my husband working for a local county entity, our insurance is not required to follow VA laws (teletherapy is required by VA law but not of all insurance types). IT IS A LOT OF FUN.

Ginny keeps threatening to leave. I keep coming up of reasons she should stay. Most importantly, she is helping my children survive. Also, we feed her well and her children will not do that for her.

Tomorrow is Saturday but it’s not really gonna be different from today.

#makeitstop


Time to leave Rosemary's

Ten days of:

Where are your pants?

Eat whatever you want!

Stop it.

I said stop it.

It's enough!!!

He hit me first.

Eamon did it.

When you wear underwear use the potty!

You're wet because you didn't use the potty.

No more jumping on the couch.

Go outside.

Open the door.

Close the door!

Where's Eamon?

Someone push Margaret on the swing. We'll pay you.

Who's going to the store?

What if they have something we want?

Stop it.

I said stop it.

It's enough!!

It's only 9:00 am? 😩😩😩


QD10

We’re doing great guys.

Eamon split his eye open before 8 am. On the table edge while sitting. Only bandages in the house were for knee scrapes the size of Texas. Pretty sure it could have used a stitch but I am not going to Urgent Care for that now. Off the grocery store, I go for liquid bandaid and smaller bandaids. CVS wasn’t even open yet. Half of me felt an urgency to get back home to close the cut up the other half was all: ARE THERE EGGS HERE? There were. It was exciting. Then while standing at the very end of the belt a good 9 feet from the customer ahead of me the check out girls says, “HEY! Can you do that thing?!” As she waves me backwards. I’m confused. She continues, “I don’t know what they are calling it these days.” I respond, “social distancing? 6 feet apart? I’m further than that away.” But also, these days? Have we done this before? How many names are there to this? LADY MY KID IS BLEEDING. 😒

Return to my house, it’s pouring rain and someone is in my parking spot. It’s barely 8:10. Run supplies into my sister. Go back outside and see owner of the offending vehicle. Ask them to move it. They say okay and proceed to spend 10 minutes unloading their work materials. 🙄

Inside, Ginny is waiting for me. Eamon doesn’t like the look of the liquid bandaid. He does not want to tilt his head up so we can see the cut. Ginny squeezes it together, I move toward him with the brush, he raises his eyebrows opening the cut. This happens like a million times. It stings, he’s pissed. He keeps lifting his eyebrows. 😩 we give up. Cut a bandaid up, and slap it on there. Someday a girl will want to know what his scar is about - Corona.

Approximately 60 seconds later, Ben is pooping. Eamon is his wingman and now also wants to be on the same potty. It’s important to know we have 3 and despite the boys always wanting to go upstairs to play and rarely getting the green light, they all only want to use the downstairs powder room AT THE SAME TIME. No one wants me to be happy. I digress. Soon Ben is screaming in horror because, wait for it, Eamon is trying to flush his pull up down the toilet. OBVIOUSLY. And I don’t know what makes me more upset: that he almost ruined our plumbing or that he wasted a dry pull up.

Things seem to settle for 15 minutes as we relax on the couch. Margaret’s climbing all over me which doesn’t really register because when isn’t she? Suddenly my hip and butt are soaking wet and cold. Margaret has spilled my drink all over me and the couch. Ginny encourages all my children to get away from me. They do not heed her advice. I try to dry/clean the couch. Margaret reappears with a kitchen towel to help. 2-year-olds really know how to live.

By the way, it’s not even 9:00 am.

I decide Corn chowder will make this rainy, terrible, no good, very bad day bearable. Ginny is leaving soon so I go to the store. 3 stores later I have to improvise some ingredients. Wait for someone who is touching every package of bacon and not selecting any of them to move because, 6 feet. Only to have them finally realize I’m there and not seem to understand why I’m waiting at a distance. The potatoes I needed were not what was laying on the shelf above his bacon quest.

BUT THEN IT GETS BETTER.

Ginny left us - something about her own children needing her. And, schools are now closed for the rest of the academic year!

You guys, I’m so lucky. I always miss my babies every minute that they are gone. Now, I never have to miss anyone ever again. Can’t take them out. Can’t leave them anywhere. And, the rest of Facebook will shame me into trying to educate them! #blessed

Fantastic. Every day will be Groundhog Day.


Last edit 5.7.2021 by Caroline Finken
all images are subject to copyright / Ariane Audet