Jena, Woodbridge VA (4/4)
"I didn’t know I was pregnant when what happened happened. Overnight, I just stopped sleeping. I went from fine to complete disaster in two days. I was 5 months postpartum, which I learned is not a good time for depression and anxiety issues. My hormones were also all over the place. Thank god I still had my counselor's number. She pretty much put me on the fast track to see a psychiatrist. It was a really rough pregnancy mentally. I was really anxious. Everyone was preparing for the worst. My husband had taken off for 2 weeks to be sure I would be fine if something bad happened after the birth. But the thing is, quite the opposite happened. As soon as I had my son in my arms, I was completely relaxed. I’ve never had a better birth and a better postpartum than with him. I was completely in love. I was also on an antidepressant and I’m sure that played a part. I was like, ‘This is how it’s supposed to be if you’re fully healthy and happy.’ Even still, I appreciate everything so, so much more. Ultimately, we have six kids even if it’s difficult when somebody asks because they’re pretty much meaning how many living kids. We usually say five, but it is always an inner conflict. Although when my other children are around, they say ‘Oh she has six, one of them died!’ They’re not shy! They talk about him a lot and they include him. I also ended up becoming a photographer for Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep. I really wanted to do something for somebody else that was in that situation. There’s really nothing you can say or do, so it’s just my little way I think I can add comfort. It’s not an easy road, but it has helped me. I’m fortunate to have this opportunity."